Certain activities, I think we can all agree, simply should be off-limits for pizza delivery people.
The guy who sets up the suction apparatus used to syphon the contents of portable toilets probably isn't the person you want delivering your Chicago-style pepperoni and cheese. Nor is anyone who is forced to don a protective suit to guard against chemical or radioactive agents while at another part-time job.
I'm guessing you also wouldn't want William Bethel Jr. on your front porch holding your steaming Domino's Deluxe Feast.
Pulled over last week for driving a station wagon with an expired inspection sticker, the Bucks County man told police he was delivering pizza in the same vehicle he uses for his other gig.
Bethel also transports corpses to mortuaries.
I suppose Bethel was employing a certain logic. The dearly departed and the extra-large Pizza Hut Cheese Lover's special typically both arrive at their final destination in boxes.
Still, police were startled by his response after they asked him just what the heck that gurney was doing in the rear of the wagon by the pies. Thankfully for the purchasers of the pizzas, the stretcher was unoccupied at the time.
What is particularly odd about this situation, however, is not Bethel's wildly disparate occupational choices.
No, what is unbelievably strange here -- and reinforces the notion that you should never, ever again call out for pizza -- is that what he was doing is perfectly legal.
Pennsylvania has no law against delivering decedents and double-cheeses in the same vehicle. Or cadavers and any food item, for that matter.
State Department of Agriculture spokesperson Chris Ryder told The Philadelphia Inquirer that it's perfectly kosher to package cadavers and croissants side-by-side in the ol' SUV as long as they were in "separate containers."
Nothing personal, Chris old buddy. But with that type of nonchalant attitude, rest assured that you and I aren't breaking bread together any time soon.
Looking for something positive out of this inexcusable lack of concern over the ride-sharing capabilities of stiffs and scones⢠Just go to your refrigerator.
That unused bag of mixed vegetables that has languished for months in the freezer suddenly doesn't look so bad. It's only sitting next to the ice-cube tray.
