Spare a thought for Polish Americans. For reasons that remain murky, they were selected as the verbal stunt-double whenever a joke called for a stupid protagonist. If they were paid royalties for every Polish joke that was ever told, they'd be hedge fund clients. It was only a matter of time before Poles fought back. Today through Sunday, three Polish-American comedians take the stage at the Pittsburgh Improv for a Warsaw-themed night of comedy and polka music. "Three Poles Walk Into a Bar" features Polish comedians Bob Golub, Bill Rutkoski and local comedian David Kaye, who reverted to his given name of Kwiatkoski for the show. Kaye grew up in the North Hills, but his father came from the SouthSide Slopes. "My dad worked in the mill," he says. "His name was so hard to pronounce, his nickname was Murphy." Rutkoski has appeared on "Arrested Development" and "Two and a Half Men." Kaye has been seen on Comedy Central and runs Slapsticks Comedy Loft in Bethel Park. Golub, the show's mastermind, came by his nickname, the Polish Madman, dishonestly. A former drug dealer, convict and boxer, he grew up in the Rust Belt hamlet of Farrell outside of Sharon, one of eight children. He put his hoodlum days behind him to become a stand-up comic, writer and filmmaker. He now lives in Los Angeles with his wife and three children. "I should have been dead five, six times, from drinking, driving, quaaludes, people shooting at me," says Golub, in a voice that still snaps with the shoving cadences of a bar fight instigator. He organized "Three Poles Walk Into a Bar" as an expression of ethnic pride but also to counter what he says are the phony branded comedy tours. "All these contrived bus tours, we don't want that," Golub says. "What we want is to grab the ethnicity of Pittsburgh." It wouldn't be a Polish show without polkas, so Grammy-nominated accordionist Kevin Solecki opens the show. Golub embarked on his comedy career after getting out of prison. He went to Florida, then to Los Angeles, then to New York City. "I would do these open mikers, where they had singers and stuff," he says. "It was hard for me, because I wasn't that well educated. I educated myself in jail and in this business." In New York City, he finally got a foothold during the comedy boom of the '80s, when a glut of comedy clubs often meant that anyone with a pulse could grab 10 minutes onstage. Golub sold cars by day and worked as a street vendor, hustling "lucky potatoes" that he told people were sprinkled with water from his grandmother's well in Pennsylvania. He also bluffed his way into an audition for "Goodfellas," Martin Scorcese's 1990 mob epic, after he brought a gun and $2,000 cash to a general casting meeting. Scorcese wasn't there, but he heard about the crazy Polish kid who had actually gone to John Gotti's hangout to do research for the role of Jimmy the Gent, which eventually went to Robert De Niro. For his hustle, Golub got the part of a truck driver who storms into a diner pretending to be upset that his truck had been stolen. He also directed the documentary "Dodo," about his tempestuous relationship with his alcoholic father. Golub attended some screenings when it played at the Three Rivers Film Festival in 2006. Additional Information:

Three Poles Walk Into a Bar

When: 8 p.m. today, 8 and 10 p.m. Friday, 7 and 9 p.m. Saturday, 7 p.m. Sunday Where: Pittsburgh Improv, Waterfront, Homestead Admission: $15 Details: 412-462-5233

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