Lorraine White was never one for big birthday celebrations.
She told her family that she didn't want a party when she was set to turn 75 on Sept. 11, 2001.
"She kept saying 'No birthday party for me this year,'" said White's daughter Deanna Mitchell, who remembered her mother saying she had a "bad feeling about that day."
"She didn't want a celebration that day," recalled Mitchell of Rural Valley, "and then that happened."
Turns out White's intuition was right. Celebrating a birthday seemed almost wrong on a day that brought so much heartache and grief. On Sept. 11, 2001, a coordinated four-plane terrorist attack killed a combined total of thousands in New York City, Washington, D.C. and Somerset County. That left those who celebrated happiness and life on Sept. 11 in a quandary.
"I thought it was a mistake," said White, who was living in Rural Valley with her husband at the time. "I soon found out it was not a mistake."
Even as White and Mitchell had a birthday lunch that day, the restaurant was quiet and all eyes were turned to a television.
"It makes you feel guilty to celebrate on that day," Mitchell said, adding that she gets upset when her mother tells someone her date of birth.
From a recliner in her room at Margaret Manor during an interview last week, White was unknowingly seated next to a clock that read 9:11 a.m.
"It makes you feel down," she said of a tragedy happening on her birthday. "It hurts. So many people lost their lives in that."
Thousands of others who were born on Sept. 11 may share the same feelings, even 10 years after the terrorist attacks that changed a day of happiness for so many. At website birthdayspirit.org, Sept. 11 babies are invited to share their feelings and give and receive advice about the change of celebrating their special day.
The site was created as a way to cope with the change by Massachusetts native Dahlia Gruen, who turned 10 years old on Sept. 11, 2001. Suggestions on the site for Sept. 11 birthdays include celebrating with local firefighters or lighting an extra candle as remembrance.
Kim Fox of Kittanning likes the idea of doing something meaningful on her Sept. 11 birthday.
"It's just a day that you want to remember and you don't want to forget," she said, noting the response she gets from others when she tells them her birth date. "My birthday was nothing compared to what happened that day."
Fox was getting bits and pieces throughout her workday and birthday of the terrorist attacks, but didn't fully understand what had happened until the afternoon. She was to celebrate her 39th birthday that night at a Pittsburgh Pirates game against the New York Mets.
"I remember getting out and the sky was so blue and so beautiful that day and so quiet," she said. "I remember initially feeling angry earlier until" fully grasping the magnitude of the tragedy.
The baseball game was canceled and a birthday dinner was held at the Allegheny Mariner.
"My birthday's not been the same since," Fox said. "My birthday's not relevant at all after that."
Birthday plans 10 years ago also were called off by Joy Patterson of Cowanshannock.
"It kind of changed my plans that way, it kind of lowered my spirits," she said of her 48th birthday on Sept. 11, 2001. "We canceled our plans and we just stayed home."
Upon arriving at work at Trader Horn that day, Patterson said there was a commotion and she soon learned why.
"We were all afraid because we didn't know what might happen," she recalled, adding that she mentioned to co-workers 'What a way to celebrate my 48th birthday.' "
It is one birthday she will always remember, but not for good reasons.
"I do have a tendency to think about that off and on as it gets close to my birthday," she said. "I still have good birthdays, it's mostly just with family and friends."
Patterson said she plans to celebrate her birthday Saturday and likely will watch memorial services on Sunday.
"For me, it makes me think about the people that are having to remember this day" as the anniversary of a death, she said. "I feel bad for those people."
County Commissioner Patty Kirkpatrick will mark her 55th birthday Sunday reflecting on her life and striving to make a difference in the lives of others.
"We celebrate in a different manner than I ever did before 2001," she said, adding that she had a quiet dinner with family that year. "Typically, birthdays are a celebration of life."
As the 10th child born to her parents, Kirkpatrick said her parents forever see Sept. 11 as a celebration of a new child. But still, the date can't be ignored, even though Kirkpatrick came into the world before Sept. 11 became associated worldwide with tragedy.
Everyone "that I have an association with who knows that's my birthday" is forever changed as a result of the terrorist attacks, she said.
At a recent public commissioners meeting, Kirkpatrick reflected on her birth date.
"When I celebrate my birthday, I still feel the emotion — thinking of all those who lost their lives and those who became heroes," she said at the meeting.
"It made us more aware of our blessings, of being more charitable, of how privileged we are," Kirkpatrick said at the meeting. "It brought people back to their churches. It was about helping humankind."
