Maybe your grandma makes a mean pierogie. But it's a good bet that she doesn't do one with peanut butter and ham.
Or buffalo chicken.
Who'd think that a 6-foot-3 former Shaler police sergeant could compete with grandma. But Carl Funtal has found a winning formula in his Cop Out Pierogies store in Etna.
Funtal was always way better in the kitchen than most people expected. But it wasn't until his daughters started getting into dance that he realized his calling.
“They were doing fundraisers, selling garbage: wreaths, $30 pizza kits,” he says. “I'm a great salesman, but I didn't like doing that. I do all kinds of cooking. And they said, ‘Why don't you sell some of your pierogies?' It was a way to get them through (dance). Now it'll be their college fund!”
Cop Out Pierogies is only open two days a week, but Funtal has as much business as he can handle.
He's investing in some equipment that will make it easier to make more pierogies, though, without losing that handmade touch.
“I'm still cutting by hand,” Funtal says. “I'm getting a little tennis elbow from pressing them. I finally bought a roller and a cutter. My plans are (for pierogies) always to be hand-pinched. I have nine employees now and am looking to step that up.”
Cop Out has business coming in from all directions. “Penn Brewery, Atria's, OTB in North Park,” Funtal says. “Smaller ones, a lot of schools, bands, youth football (teams) come to me for fundraisers. I'm not a businessman or chef. I haven't gone out there soliciting anybody. Everybody's (come) to us.”
He's had two strategies to growing his business, both of which have worked beyond expectations.
“I grew up eating pierogies,” he says. “If you'd just say ‘potatoes and dough,' though, that doesn't even sound good. I know it is — I've been eating them all my life.”
So, the plan was to please the traditionalists first, and then try all kinds of odd flavors and fillings to attract the curious.
“I had some ideas to draw people into eating pierogies,” Funtal says. “Mac and cheese pierogies. Sounds terrible — a pasta in a pasta? — but that's a big seller. Don't try spaghetti in a pierogie though, that's terrible. Chicken parm, chicken marsala are good, though.”
“Obviously, No. 1 is potato and cheese. No. 2 is buffalo chicken, which isn't anything like that. Reuben is No. 3.”
Yes, he makes a Reuben pierogie. There are other pierogies with names like Chicken Spring Roll, Pilgrim, Breakfast and Pepperbutt. Funtal's “dozen” contains 14 pierogies, which cost from $7.50 to $14.75, depending on the filling.
The dessert Pie-rogies are another specialty, like Bavarian Cream, Salted Caramel and Apple Maple Walnut Cheesecake (all $9 for 14).
Funtal is willing to turn just about anything into a pierogie filling.
“I sent out a large order to Harrisburg, to Verizon. One girl — it sounded terrible — her aunt used to make her peanut butter and ham sandwiches, so she wanted peanut butter and ham (pierogies),” Funtal recalls. “To be honest, it wasn't bad.
“I've had people from down South ask for shrimp, grits and bacon. I'll make people whatever they want.”
Making pierogies is different from being a police officer, obviously. And Funtal likes it that way.
“What I like about (this) business is that I have to be good day in and day out. If I'm not good, they're not buying from me.”
Cop Out Pierogies, 350 Butler St., Etna, is open from 11 a.m. to 5 p.m. Fridays and 11 a.m. to 3 p.m. Saturdays. 412-973-0068 or copoutpierogies.com
Michael Machosky is a Tribune-Review staff writer. Reach him at machosky@tribweb.com or 412-320-7901.
