WASHINGTON - Once upon a time, we would call for three cheers for the Mouseketeers. Sadly those days have passed and we are being asked to cheer the Summiteers. There have been so many summits as of late that we in Washington should reclassify late May early June as Summit Season. There has been the World Trade Organization meeting in Geneva. And the United Nations brought hundreds more to the same Swiss city for the Forest Forum. Meanwhile, Vladimir Putin spends vast amounts of money to showcase the 300th anniversary of his native St. Petersburg. Then the International Association of Ports and Harbors brought a thousand delegates to berth in Durban, South Africa. The generals, admiral and diplomats of NATO gathered in Prague to prepare their next summit. As events wound down in St. Petersburg, the Commonwealth of Independent States (CIS) -- the old, and to many of us, much unchanged "evil empire" of the Soviet Union -- started its meetings. As these ended, there was a European and Russian summit to prepare for the Group of Eight (G8) summit, beginning today, being hosted by French President Jacques Chirac in a small gem of a city on the south side of Lake Geneva, Evian-les-Bains. And this last is probably the most sinister of the summits. Its potential to harm the world is certainly the greatest. WEASELS & CO. Now, to digress, Evian is known for its ice cold mineral baths, fueled by an economy based on snow-cooled mineral water. Evian is a town favored by the ancient Gauls, fought for by the Romans and now home to wealthy solid citizens of France. Jolly Jacques Chirac has selected it for strategic regions to preside over his "Axis of Weasels" -- Germany, Russia and his own France - with Canada and Japan as assistant weasels. Their hope is to ambush President George W. Bush with Europe's ploy against America's efficient agricultural production -- the ban on genetically modified foods -- and with demands that France, Russia, Germany and China be fully reimbursed for the bits and pieces of nuclear and other weapons they sold to Saddam Hussein. Unwilling to risk Saddam's repayments, the Weasels did nothing to help George Bush in fighting the war against the first Axis of Evil. Now, Jolly Jacques is back, saying that unity and economic cooperation is all-important. By that he means France should lead the demands for money from oil contracts with Iraq. (Little is being said about Putin's role in sending the veteran spymaster Yevgeny Primakov to Baghdad, and nothing is mentioned about the masses of documents that the Russian Embassy rushed out of Baghdad across the border into Syria). It will take more than the mineral baths of Evian to clean up Jolly Jacques' act of Gallic enthusiasm. As an avid supporter of soccer matches, Chirac knows the value of having a supporters club in place. So the chief weasel has invited heads of state from India, Malaysia, Mexico, Brazil, Morocco, Saudi Arabia, Switzerland and several of his African clients to attend as his axis of rabbits. He also invited China's Hu Jintao to take part. But Hu, while deciding to visit France, appears to be more Putin's guest than Chirac's. Chirac also made up the agenda. War against terrorism, ethics, responsibility in social and environmental matters, assistance to Africa -- all these good things are on the agenda. Praise will be given to the United States for its assistance to AIDS/HIV victims (only in Africa and the Caribbean) and there will be major discussions on water problems in Asia and Africa. The Europeans come in freshly proud of having voted to reduce the cost of drugs sold in poor countries for some critical illnesses (malaria, HIV, sleeping sickness, etc.) by some 65 to 75 percent. KNEE-SLAPPERS Two items have the world's cynics rolling in the aisles with laughter. First, arms sales will be discussed and discouraged. At the same time, a European Union summit will be meeting in Thessaloniki, Greece, to discuss weapons design and future sharing of production costs of weapons, so that the investment in weapons made for export can be kept at an "economic level" -- meaning lower costs and more buyers. The second cause for hilarity is that Jolly Jacques is leading a discussion on "democracy." Why is that funny• The Evian Summit is the very antithesis of a democratic gathering. And, it is all being done in the name of "security." Evian is bordered by Lake Geneva on one side, and a mountain on the other. There is only one road in and out of town. For the Group of Eight, an area with a radius of 25 miles is being sealed off. All shops, markets, offices, museums, libraries and such were ordered closed from last Thursday until next Tuesday. People who work have been told either go on vacation or stay in your home. Starting two weeks before the summit, Evian's townsfolk underwent mandatory documentation and photography. Supplemented by the French army, tanks, attack helicopters, surveillance drones and anti-aircraft systems on the lakefront promenade, 18,000 police will be on duty around Evian. Every power boat owned by the French gendarmes across the country was trucked into town last Sunday to begin patrolling the lake. Talk about overkill. The tourism industry was shut down. All camping sites were closed except one 5 miles out of town which is the designated journalism center. Journalists are such a threat to Jolly Jacques that barbed wire, Humvees, armored vehicles, machine gun-toting police and sniper teams already surrounded their site where there was one lonely journalist waving an entry pass a week ago. Across the lake, Geneva has mobilized 10,000 police from all over Switzerland, begged the Germans to lend them another thousand and arranged to borrow half a dozen water cannon from those staunch upholders of democracy in Berlin. The estimated cost• The low-ball figure is $3 million to $4 million, for just the Swiss overtime. Who is to be safeguarded• The major countries will each field delegations of some 800 people. Another two or three dozen delegates will accompany leader invited by Chirac. International agencies will be present in their dozens and 2,000 to 3,000 journalists are expected. The Axis of Weasels will be well protected. No one is saying what the cost will be, but last year the costs to Canada of the G8 gathering were some $347 million. This year's estimates for Chirac's extravaganza are in the half-billion dollar range. PROTESTERS SCARED OFF We know well from meetings since Seattle in 1999, followed by World Bank meetings in Washington D.C., as well as previous, infamous G-8 summit battlefields, that the People's Global Action and Social Forum offshoots across the world are ready to demonstrate and make their unpopular views newsworthy. But even they have backed out of this one -- with the French plain clothes police outnumbering the citizens of Evian, and the impossible lay of the land, there is nowhere for them to get their message out, or avoid being contained, penned in, and penalized. Oh, horrors! No one has told the police or the president that in and around the shores of Lake Geneva are the ornate estates, shielded from the world by opulent green and gold gates favored by wealthy Arabs. These are the homes of the very wealthy from Saudi Arabia, Syria, Yemen and Iraq. What if home had become a center for their revolutionary minded children, or distant cousins, or friends of friends? And who is living in or visiting the stately home of Osama bin Laden's brother, well within a 10-minute drive of Evian? Dateline D.C. is written by a Washington-based British journalist and political observer. Additional Information:

Coming June 8

Senate Minority Leader 'Tiny Tom' Daschle embraces class warfare as he heads into a re-election campaign in South Dakota where most voters support President George W. Bush. Read about it in Sunday's 'Dateline D.C.' column, a Tribune-Review exclusive.

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