As cruel and unusual punishment at an invitational screening of “Unaccompanied Minors,” they showed the movie. The premise is pure “high-concept”: Dozens of minors are stranded at a fictional Midwestern airport on Christmas Eve during a blizzard. They behave abominably when herded into a gray cinder-block holding area. All but six then are discarded from the film. The five oldest of the six, all around 13 years of age, team up to make life hard on nice junior airport employee Zach (Wilmer Valderrama) and miserable for passenger relations supervisor Mr. Porter (Lewis Black). Nothing makes sense, from one boy’s indifference to finding and shepherding his vulnerable little sister, to the fact that most of the behavior by nincompoop adults is a massive lawsuit in progress — something the movie doesn’t notice. The action occurs mainly in staff-only corridors, air ducts and baggage storage areas. It’s so much easier to film isolated areas. It’s your guess what any character of any age thinks he’s accomplishing. Even the seemingly sensible Zach is clueless. The kids never access the airport’s dining areas — as if they wouldn’t. They never rest. After more than an hour of thoroughly illogical behavior, the phony baloney uplift begins. Professor Henry Higgins spoke of throwing the baggage out. Only the baggage, Hank• How about the whole picture•

In wide release.

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‘Unaccompanied Minors’Rated PG for mild rude humor and language;

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