As graduating students march to “Pomp and Circumstance” during their commencement ceremonies, they and their fans in the audience must remember to honor the pomp part of the occasion, school officials say.

Graduation is a momentous day for everyone involved — not just one student or family. Understanding and respecting this fact forms the foundation for proper graduation etiquette, and consideration of others at the ceremony.

“We remind them that it’s their day, but it’s also their classmates’ day,” says Richard Gable. He is the associate head of Shady Side Academy Senior School in Fox Chapel, which has its graduation ceremonies on June 11. “We remind them that everyone has their time on the stage … and their right to be on the stage and be recognized.

“By and large, most people behave,” Gable says.

Graduation, while a happy event, is an emotional event filled with memories, and should have an air of formality about it to some degree, Gable says. Save any goofy behavior for later, he says.

“A lot of our students feel that way,” he says. “They’re festive and they’re happy about the occasion, but they understand that there a time and a place for silly stuff.”

Charmaine Strong, dean of students at Seton Hill University in Greensburg, agrees.

” ‘Bittersweet’ is the best way to describe it,” she says about the mood of graduation. “It is a very sentimental, although exciting, celebration.”

Seton Hill officials recommend that female graduates avoid wearing big, chunky jewelry, and tell graduates to place their mortarboard parallel to the floor. In the ’80s era of big hair, especially, many women wore their caps on the back of their heads so that their teased bangs would stick out.

While family members and friends are welcome to cheer for their graduates, Strong and Gable recommend holding the cheering to no more than a few seconds. Long cheering can prevent people from hearing the next person’s name when it’s called. And don’t yell anything, even in good humor, that might be embarrassing to anyone.

“This is an exciting day for these kids,” Strong says. Seton Hill had its graduation on May 15. “We hope that they are respectful. It’s a celebration, but there is some decorum. … Just enjoy it.”

John Pietrusinski — principal of Pine-Richland High School, which will have graduation Friday — agrees that respect is the key word for graduation etiquette.

“It can’t be about you and your own family,” he says. “It needs to be about everybody who is sitting there.”

Kids should focus on blending in at a graduation ceremony, rather than standing out, Pietrusinski says.

“It’s not a time to make a statement about how cool you are and draw attention to yourself,” he says. Graduation “is the culmination of a long time of work. There’s exuberance there … (but) this is supposed to be a dignified event.”

At some smaller schools, like Penn State-New Kensington, graduation ceremonies are much more laid-back than at other places. Bill Hamilton, a biology professor who has served as graduation marshal for eight years, tells the university’s families that almost anything they want to do, within reason, is acceptable. With an average class size of 80 to 90 people in a typical semester, fans can take extra time to cheer, because officials aren’t in as much of a hurry to move everybody along, Hamilton says.

“We have as much time as we need to do the ceremony,” he says. “When somebody’s name is called, I encourage the students to tell their friends and family members to yell, clap and make noise. … The intent of it isn’t to be a solemn occasion, but a celebration of their accomplishments.

“We have very, very few guidelines,” Hamilton says. “We’ve never had any kind of boorish behavior.”

At his daughter, Marian’s, graduation two years ago at Penn State’s main campus in University Park, audience members were told not to shout, cheer or clap — but they had about 1,400 students in the ceremony, Hamilton says.

Additional Information:

Ceremony etiquette

School experts interviewed offer the following advice:

• Common sense and courtesy is the rule of thumb. Think about what might make you enjoy your/your loved one’s special day less, and avoid doing those things to other people.

• No pranks of any kind, and absolutely no booing other students. Show respect for others and for the decorum of the ceremony.

• No texting or talking on cell phones during the ceremony.

• If your loved one’s ceremony involves a few hundred graduates, especially, cheer for no more than a few seconds. If you cheer too long, people can’t hear the name of the next graduate. The same goes for graduates cheering on their friends.

• Dress appropriately under the graduation gown — no shorts for men, so that hairy legs don’t stick out — and wear comfortable but appropriately dressy shoes (no flip-flops, for instance). Don’t be too casual.

• In the audience, don’t block the view of the people behind you; stay seated.

• Most schools won’t appreciate items like air horns, balloons and beach balls. They are too loud or distracting.

• Stay through the entire ceremony; leaving early is very disrespectful to other graduates.

Source: Tribune-Review research

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