Matt Ferris, a former Connellsville Area High School wrestler, is starting his journey as a wrestling parent. His sons, Aaron, 8 and Dalton, 4, are elementary school Junior Olympic wrestlers. He is a coach.
"Journey" aptly describes the lifestyle, according to wrestling parents Marvin and Stacey Snyder, Cotty and Robin Martin and John and Lorie Donato, who have been down that path themselves.
Their sons are among 13 Connellsville Area High School seniors on the state championship wrestling team.
Joshua Martin, 18, in the 145-weight class, began wrestling at age 4. Zach Snyder, 18, in the 140-weight class, began the sport at age 8.
The Snyders aren't done yet. Their younger son, Andy, 15, began wrestling at age 6. He's a sophomore in the 140-pound weight class.
The CAHS wrestling team won the AAA high school team title at the state tournament in Hershey on Feb. 12.
"We've just lived a dream come true," Martin said. "If there was a group of boys who could do it, this was it. We've actually lived one of our dreams, as individuals, wrestling families, a group. And we have watched these boys grow up to be successful young men."
Mark King represents the commitment of wrestling parents. His two sons, Matt and Jared, are 2000 and 2004 CAHS graduates respectively. Matt King is a graduate student in Pittsburgh and Jared King is a red-shirt freshman at the University of Oklahoma.
Mark King remains a member of the larger wrestling family formed through the years, according to Snyder, of Bullskin Township. King, Snyder and Martin coached elementary school wrestling together; King and Snyder continue volunteer coaching in the high school.
"Snyder and King are like brothers, the ones I never had," said Martin, an Indian Head resident. "It's a close-knit group, and these relationships will last a lifetime. We look after each other as extended family. We've lived through personal tragedies together."
He explained that as a lawyer he helps with legal problems, and King, who operates a physical therapy facility, helps with the wrestlers' therapy needs.
Martin once wrestled at Norwin Area High School and the University of Findlay in Ohio.
"I just love the sport of wrestling," he said. "It teaches these kids everything they need to know about life: the ups and downs, how to get up off their backs."
Snyder said although he wasn't a high school wrestler he was a wrestling fan, and has spent years following the program. Wrestling parents Ron and Charlene Doppelheuers, convinced the Snyders the sport was good for their sons.
Both Snyder and Martin laughed when asked what wrestling does to family life.
"That's a loaded question," Snyder said. "My whole family is involved in wrestling during the season, and it's our family time every day. Evenings and weekends we live, breathe and eat wrestling in my house. It's been a family event for 10 years."
Martin concurs. "It's what we do 24 hours a day, besides going to work. We eat, sleep and drink wrestling. It's a full-time job."
Grandparents are immersed in the lifestyle as well, Martin said.
"At Thanksgiving, dinner meals are prepared for the boys, if they are watching their weight," he noted. "We try to get holidays out of the way to keep weight and stay healthy."
Martin said his son gets home from school, eats, does homework -- and practices wrestling -- twice a day, five days a week, while Snyder proudly pointed out his sons are consistently on the honor roll and haven't missed a day of school during the wrestling season.
"Wrestling causes them to be disciplined students, able to focus time and focus on what is important," Snyder said. "It has undoubtedly made them better students."
Martin's older son, Joel Martin, a former wrestler, works as an inspector at a lumber company in Titusville. Martin credits wrestling with teaching him responsibility, working hard, and humility.
"He knows he's accountable for himself, that if he doesn't work he doesn't get paid," Martin said. "And in wrestling if they don't work hard they aren't successful."
John and Lorie Donato's fraternal twins, Jake Knepper (a 119-pound wrestler) and Adam Knepper (a 160-pound wrestler) wrestled with the elementary school team.
"I think that's why they wrestled so good as a team," Lorie Donato said. "They are hard workers and dedicated, and it shows by their winning the state championship."
Wrestling is not a sport to Donato, but a lifestyle. When the boys were 6, she wanted an activity for them.
"We tried basketball; it wasn't for them," said the parent who describes wrestling as a sport you either love or hate, one that is basically addictive or not enjoyed. "I'd heard wrestling was a discipline sport, and the discipline was appealing."
Wrestlers back their rigorous practice schedule with a mission statement they commit to at the beginning of the season, Donato said. It includes team and individual goals which families help them meet.
Elementary school wrestling is an individual sport, according to Donato.
"You can't blame it (errors) on someone else or a team," she said. "It was a little hard when the boys were little, understanding that they did a good job when they lost. It's difficult for young kids to understand the win-loss thing."
In junior high school, wrestling becomes a team sport that retains its individual character, according to Donato.
"The kids still have to take the win or the loss itself," Donato said. "That's hard for a kid to do, especially when they're little or they've lost it (the win) for the team."
Even with younger wrestlers the sport is time-consuming, Donato said.
"You get up early -- around 5:30 a. m. -- and spend all day in a gym with maybe 500 people, and your kids only wrestle three times."
The families that travel together become best friends, Donato said. "The nice thing about being a wrestling parent is that they are like a family themselves. It's close-knit and I'm there for the other kids as well as mine. It's a unique situation."
Being a wrestling parent has some hardships beyond the rigorous schedule. One hassle is the wrestler's need for non-fattening nutrition, according to Donato.
"We have to deal with the boys' temperaments," Donato said. "They're trying to make weight. Their moodiness is because they aren't eating what they want to eat."
Snyder credits his wife with maintaining their son's weight through menu controls.
In season, the kids, who decide themselves to give up parties and other friends, need parental support, Donato said.
Although another challenge is cost, it's not the participation that's expensive, according to Snyder .
The costs include travel expenses such as gas tires, hotel rooms and eating on the road as well as the entry fees for each tournament participant, she said.
"There were a lot of years and hotels and thousands of miles of traveling," Snyder said.
The Donatos face another challenge because a younger son wrestles in junior high.
"My husband travels with him for weekends or days," said Donato, who attends the twins' matches. She acknowledges they "feel bad missing the matches of our sons, but it was our choice to support each kid."
Parents of the senior wrestlers are the Martins; Snyders; the Donatos and Doppelheuers and Nicky Bell ; Leanne King Bell; Jim and Debbie McGinnis; Kathy Jo Sines and Delbert Sines.
Jill Juengel is also a "wrestling" parent. She chaperones the team managers: sophomore Elizabeth Bell, 15; junior Nikki Sleasman, 16, and, a sophomore, and her daughter Kelly Juengel, 17, a senior.
Juengel admits her family's uniqueness. "Basically it's the women that are interested in, and addicted to, wrestling," she said. "The men aren't. My sons aren't interested at all."
As an Indiana High School student, Jill Juengel was a mat maid who kept statistics and traveled with wrestling team. After she and her husband, the Rev. Mark Juengel, moved to Connellsville in 1995, she held her interest in wrestling.
Her involvement in CAHS wrestling increased when the Knepper twins began attending the church and her daughter, Kelly Juengel, then a junior high cheerleader, became team manager in 10th grade.
Her husband, pastor at the Connellsville United Presbyterian Church, is accustomed to her wrestling lifestyle.
"He's patient and knows November through March we are frequently gone weekends," she said. "He can't sit all day in the bleachers and it's one of the sports he's not into that much."
She expressed pleasure at the community recognition for the team that won the state championship. Team members received a proclamation from Connellsville City Council and were recognized by the school board.
"Fifteen fire trucks escorted the team to the schools when they returned," she said.
This is some of what Matt Ferris can expect on his journey that follows his sons through their wrestling commitment until their high school graduation.
