Archive

Letter to the editor: ‘Lack-eys’ wanted | TribLIVE.com
Letters to the Editor

Letter to the editor: ‘Lack-eys’ wanted

Do you lack character? A backbone? Dignity? The ability to think or to check facts? A moral compass? Do you lack self-control? Then you’re a lack-ey! White House jobs now available, but hurry — there are 10 great lack-eys applying for every job!

Great training provided — here’s a peek into the syllabus:

• Sessions with Sessions — Students are publicly shamed and humiliated by Jeff Sessions. After each act of humiliation, students will attempt to stand, which should be impossible because backbones aren’t allowed. In one class, he will impersonate Mr. Magoo. Act fast as he shows partial backbone, may not last.

• Crimes in Moral Turpitude — Working one-on-one with multiple instructors including former administration officials. Lessons in money laundering and lying under oath. The instructors represent “the best of the best.” Paul Manafort and Rick Gates lead our discussion. The president may teach this class himself someday.

• Losing Self-Control: Sam Nunberg focuses on melting down under pressure. Anthony Scaramucci will lead the class in “telling it like it is.” The lesson includes ways to demean your opponents by using descriptions of seemingly anatomically impossible sex acts.

Only lack-eys without backbones will be considered. Accredited and endorsed by Trump University!

Gregory Schmidt

Bethel Park


TribLIVE commenting policy

You are solely responsible for your comments and by using TribLive.com you agree to our Terms of Service.

We moderate comments. Our goal is to provide substantive commentary for a general readership. By screening submissions, we provide a space where readers can share intelligent and informed commentary that enhances the quality of our news and information.

While most comments will be posted if they are on-topic and not abusive, moderating decisions are subjective. We will make them as carefully and consistently as we can. Because of the volume of reader comments, we cannot review individual moderation decisions with readers.

We value thoughtful comments representing a range of views that make their point quickly and politely. We make an effort to protect discussions from repeated comments either by the same reader or different readers

We follow the same standards for taste as the daily newspaper. A few things we won't tolerate: personal attacks, obscenity, vulgarity, profanity (including expletives and letters followed by dashes), commercial promotion, impersonations, incoherence, proselytizing and SHOUTING. Don't include URLs to Web sites.

We do not edit comments. They are either approved or deleted. We reserve the right to edit a comment that is quoted or excerpted in an article. In this case, we may fix spelling and punctuation.

We welcome strong opinions and criticism of our work, but we don't want comments to become bogged down with discussions of our policies and we will moderate accordingly.

We appreciate it when readers and people quoted in articles or blog posts point out errors of fact or emphasis and will investigate all assertions. But these suggestions should be sent via e-mail. To avoid distracting other readers, we won't publish comments that suggest a correction. Instead, corrections will be made in a blog post or in an article.